Laptop from Hell: Hallie Drama

Welcome back to Hunter Biden’s Laptop from Hell. In this episode we take a look through a chunk of his drama-packed relationship with Hallie Biden, his sister-in-law. For those who don’t know, the two became romantically entangled after the death of Hallie’s husband (Hunter’s brother), Beau Biden.

This one is for the people (usually on 4chan and Reddit) who say that Hunter is a Chad, because really he is anything but.

“But why is this important?” you may ask. It isn’t. It is interesting, though, and parts of it are funny. Some of these glimpses into Hunter Biden’s life offer a much-needed change of pace from the otherwise disturbing content of this website.

As always, screenshots of the text messages will appear in chronological order. The following are all from April through June, 2018.

I’m sure many of us have been there before: so needy. Sending long paragraphs and getting a few words in return. Already you might wanna tell him to take it easy, but it actually gets a lot worse.

Hunter seems to have ended the relationship here. And then later that same day…

This whole part is so great because he’s clearly being sarcastic and she doesn’t realize it. At one point she even asks if he’s being sarcastic but then believes him when he says he’s not.

This is early in the next morning and he’s still railing against her. And I’ve edited some of it out, mind you.

This screenshot is a good microcosm of the entire chatlog between these two. About 95% of the text messages in it are sent by Hunter, with Hallie replying once in awhile and almost never responding directly to anything he says.

And you just gotta love the idea of pointing to the opinion of one’s own father as proof of anything. Of course he’s gonna side with you, Hunter.

“FT and not talk” means “Watch me shower” basically, which Hallie is inviting Hunter to do here. I’ve seen it used a few times throughout all these leaked text message conversations.

Man, it hurts to see someone being so needy. It never helps the situation. I don’t know what he’s trying to accomplish when he says things like, “I don’t get hard anymore when I hear your voice but (I) still am so weak for you.”

It’s kind of sad. But then you remember he’s banging hookers and floozies on the side, and it’s not so sad anymore.

And how dare she say that his penis is only average in size!

God, this is so pathetic. He is completely powerless and helpless when it comes to this woman.

At least he was able to see through her attempt to extract money from him.

So that’s how they hooked up originally.

Now Hallie finds out that Hunter has been cheating on her. Imagine if she knew about all the hookers and other random hookups as well… And to think, this is all while he plays the victim and drones on and on to Hallie about how bad of a partner she is to him. They are both just awful.

LOL. It’s so crazy being able to read these conversations. This is the current president’s son. Relationships, sex, sticking your tongue in someone’s ass: these are great equalizers that let us know that no matter how rich, famous and powerful you get, we still share common struggles and triumphs.

A couple of days later and Hallie has forgiven Hunter and convinces him to come see her. Hunter, the desperate lovesick puppy dog that he is, rushes over- abandoning his children in the process. Then when he arrives, she’s not even there. This isn’t even the only time this has happened, believe it or not.

Hallie is so over it on June 1st, back to being in love on June 2nd and offering more “FT and not talk” on June 3rd. Hunter again silently watches her get nude on FaceTime. Now he thinks she’s “the sexiest hottest” woman ever. Remember like a week ago when he was saying she’s an ugly middle-aged woman or something like that?

Hunter is blocking her phone number! Oh, shit… It’s over now. Wait… No… five hours later and everything’s okay.

And then Hallie goes immediately from “I love you” to “Fuck you!”

Holy shit. That’s enough for now. There’s actually a lot more- this is about a third of the way through their text message history for these phone numbers- but I feel like that’s enough for this installment.